“We like to think of America as Land of the Free, where everyone is loved and valued. But growing up as a child, I lived a different story.”
Anita had always been treated differently because of the color of her skin. Normally one could find comfort and support within their own family, but even there she also suffered. “I wasn’t good enough in my family’s eyes. I didn’t get straight A’s. Didn’t follow the ‘right’ career path and, well, I was ‘too American.’” she shares. She was often compared to others who seem to fit their ideal mold better than her.
As a student she was bullied by girls in the halls at the end of the school day because of her ethnicity and skin color. “Go back to where you came from!” she heard often (though she was born in America).
Her family and school-based disapproval combo contributed to her lack of inner confidence, “On the outside, I played the part of a happy person, masking the fear and insecurity. On the inside, I lived most of my life with an intimidated mind and a broken heart.”
Girlfriends used and betrayed her. In her dating world, guys manipulated, overpowered and controlled her. And at one point, she had almost lost her life escaping an abusive relationship.
“Waking up in the hospital and recognizing the damage someone did to keep me from leaving him made me reach my all-time low; I wanted to die.”
She didn’t see herself to be of any value anymore. She closed her eyes and asked the Lord to take her. “I was done being here, I just wanted out. But then I realized something: I was still here. I should have been dead. The Lord should have taken me already. But I survived. I was still here.” That’s when Anita recognized the beginning of her worth, and that her worth had a purpose.
“I decided to make something of the life I was given.”
As an entertainment and emotion-based person, Anita took notice of the songs she was drawn to and connected to their messages. They were messages of revival. Of overcoming battles. Of living. She learned breathing techniques and healed her heart through meditation and reprogramming her thoughts and perspectives. She gravitated to books that brought her to her knees in gratitude and to her feet in power.
“And within one year my confidence rose.”
Her worth began to matter. As it developed, Anita’s world began to change for the better. She met her true friend, love and partner in life. Her work brought her to a new place. And as life began to feel secure, the career world rose and crashed on her like a tsunami she never saw coming.
In Anita’s career, she was overlooked for career opportunities and treated poorly, despite her best talents and loyal efforts.
“Being bullied as a child is bad, indeed. But being bullied as a grown up? Incomprehensible. Yet, it happened.”
She’d been excluded by managers, deemed unlikable because of her ethnicity, and let go of a prominent position because pregnancy no longer made her a valuable asset. In the world of business, being bullied, neglected and abandoned cuts deep when our only mission is to apply our talent, build lasting relationships, and earn our worth.
“The day I was escorted out of a company shortly after announcing my pregnancy, that was it. I’d had enough.”
After years involved in her own personal growth and hard inner work, experiencing such a moment lit her fire for proper change. “I knew that if I wanted my life to be better, I had to make stronger changes. I had stand up for myself. Defend myself. And live for myself.”
By owning her self-worth and raising the vision of what was possible, Anita’s whole world transformed.
After beating the odds Anita recognized the importance of our own power and how crucial it is to refuse and overcome inaccurate definitions built by others; of our own power to rebuild, reinforce and respect ourselves in order to reclaim our real worth.
“My 180-turn-around inspired me to help others experience that same personal empowerment.”
In 2010, Anita decided to write a book called The Dating GPS: Guys, Pricks and Sweethearts a down- to-earth, honest, real, funny, and entertaining relationship resource book designed to help women re-engage their personal power and attract men who valued and cherished them. The project was a five-year event, collecting stories from women across the United States and working with childhood friend and published author, Alexsandra Sukhoy of Creative Cadence, contributing author, Frankie Doiron of Impact Coaching Academy, male panelists, professional contributors and storytellers spanning the globe who all came together to help her share her vision. The Dating GPS: Guys, Pricks and Sweethearts was released on September 15th, 2015 and available on Amazon.
“My passion in helping others continued when I founded InnerScope Consulting.”
Today, Anita is the president of InnerScope Consulting, a coaching and consulting practice designed to support people who are reaching for higher goals, better relationships (both personal and professional), and an overall improved life and lifestyle.
She coaches and mentors singles, couples and parents to recognize their true power, own their self-worth and embrace self-love. The results are worth more than anything imaginable.
“It’s an amazing feeling. You unlock gates to opportunities. You unleash desires you thought you couldn’t have. You begin to feel stronger, more powerful and able to reach higher ground. It’s quite superhero-esque, but aren’t we? We just have to harness the vision, and set ourselves free to reach that destination.”
Anita’s advice to you?
“Life is here with you right now. This is your time.
Your opportunity to take yourself to the next level of you.
Who you will be next year depends on who you want to be now.
Your door to opportunity is knocking.
It’s time for you to go answer it!
And I’ll help you get there, faster.”